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Post by reg on Apr 4, 2006 14:10:36 GMT
A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, "What would you like, sir?" He looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."
The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again the man thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."
This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away.
A man sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, "Um, Pal, I think it's pronounced 'quiche'."
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Post by specialk on Apr 6, 2006 9:51:50 GMT
hahahahah very good - was he american?
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 6, 2006 9:59:56 GMT
Why don't blind people like to sky dive? Because it scares the hell out of the dog How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it. How are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same? Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.
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Post by specialk on Apr 6, 2006 10:32:33 GMT
grooooooooooooannnnnnnnnnnnn and hahahahaha
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on May 5, 2006 9:55:43 GMT
A little paper bag was feeling unwell, so he took himself off to The doctors.
"Doctor, I don't feel too good," said the little paper bag.
"Hmm, you look OK to me," said the doctor, "but I'll do a blood test and see what that shows, Come back and see me in a couple of days."
The little paper bag felt no better when he got back for the results.
"What's wrong with me?" asked the little paper bag.
"I'm afraid you are HIV positive!" said the doctor.
"No, I can't be - I'm just a little paper bag!" Said the little paper bag.
"Have you been having unprotected sex?" Asked the doctor.
"NO, I can't do things like that - I'm just a little paper bag!"
"Well have you been sharing needles with other Intravenous drug users?" Asked the doctor.
"NO, I can't do things like that - I'm just a little paper bag!"
"Perhaps you've been abroad recently and required a jab or a blood transfusion?" queried the doctor.
"NO, I don't have a passport - I'm just a little paper bag!"
"Well", said the doctor, "are you in a homosexual relationship?"
"NO! I told you I can't do things like that, I'm just a little paper bag!"
"Then there can be only one explanation." Said the doctor...
"Your mother must have been a carrier"
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Post by specialk on May 5, 2006 13:55:57 GMT
#jump# #jump# #jump# am speechless at that one lol
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Post by happy on May 5, 2006 13:57:14 GMT
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Post by reg on May 5, 2006 14:53:33 GMT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".
The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says:
"HEBREWS"
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Post by specialk on May 5, 2006 15:43:27 GMT
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on May 6, 2006 18:42:36 GMT
#laugh# #laugh# #laugh#
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Post by reg on May 7, 2006 12:49:32 GMT
How do you find a lost rabbit?
Easy! just make a noise like a carrot #roflmao#
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Post by specialk on May 7, 2006 21:50:42 GMT
lol
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